


Aerde's Welt

by SeleneDarkbloom



Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: Canonical Character Death, Character Study, Gen, I physically cannot write without angst, I would appreciate if ao3 didn't mess up the order of my tags everytime I edit them, No beta we die like mne, Noctis went poof, Older Noctis Week 2K19, The Bros are here but in a small dose, angst with a hopeful end, or did he?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-23
Updated: 2019-09-23
Packaged: 2020-10-25 20:36:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,332
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20730392
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SeleneDarkbloom/pseuds/SeleneDarkbloom
Summary: He wanted the quietness he never had and to feel the weightlessness around him, no burdens to shoulder anymore. Yet there was a part of him that yearned for life, he knew that. He might’ve told his friends he had made his peace but that was a lie he told himself to create a semblance of comfort and closure. Te what they had to do easier. And that  itself was a lie.Nothing about it was easy. It was for the dawn, so that humanity could keep on living. And for that he was willing to give up his life, and he would do it again no matter how much he craved for life, for warmth.He loved them. They were his everything, they stayed with him and all he wanted was to be with them. But he couldn’t, they were there, unreachable in the living world and he was…He didn’t know where he was.





	Aerde's Welt

**Author's Note:**

> Fill for Day one of Older Noctis Week 2019
> 
> Prompt: Immortal/Dawn

_ Pain. _

Searing and unbearable has his ancestors slashed their way out after they had cut their way in. 

He _ screamed. _

It wasn’t just the physical pain — was it still physical inside the Crystal? — it was everything, all the things he lost and everything he wanted and would never have. It was his love and his hate. His sorrow and relief. He wanted it to end, the hurt, he _ needed _ it to end. Not only for him, but for everyone else as well. If he was truly honest with himself, if it wasn’t for everyone else’s sake, Ignis, Prompto and Gladio… The people they met, the innocents they didn’t meet, he wouldn’t have the courage to do it if it weren’t for them. 

And so he pushed on.

_ It was finally over. _

* * *

He didn’t exactly know what there was for him in the afterlife — if that was even real. In all fairness he expected the nothingness to envelop him completely, to all of it to just… Stop. Where he would simply no longer exist, that thought was both relieving and terrifying. Part of him wanted the end, the _ silence _. He wanted the quietness he never had and to feel the weightlessness around him, no burdens to shoulder anymore. Yet there was a part of him that yearned for life, he knew that. He might’ve told his friends he had made his peace but that was a lie if he had ever seen one. 

A lie he told them, a lie he told _ himself _ to create a semblance of comfort and closure. A lie to make what they — he — had to do easier. And that thought in and of itself was a lie. Nothing about it was easy, but maybe it was comforting. It was for the dawn, so that humanity could keep on living. And for that he was willing to give up his life, and he would do it again no matter how much he craved for life, for warmth. The little things he took for granted like the smell of grass after it rained, the blooming flowers and the birds singing outside, the lingering smell of Ignis’ cooking, his father’s fleeting and rare reassuring touches; all of these things made his heart ache. He caught himself thinking how he would never hear his friends laughing at him and with him. He would miss Prompto’s never-ending joy, Gladio’s tough guy attitude only to hide one of the kindest hearts he’d ever known and Ignis’ mother hening and awful puns. 

He loved them. They were his everything, without them he wouldn’t be who he is. He wouldn’t have gotten anywhere without them, and for that Noctis was grateful. They stayed with him ‘till the end and all he wanted was to be with them, always. But he couldn’t do that. They were there, unreachable in the living world and he was… 

He didn’t know _ where _ he was. There was nothing — huh, maybe he was right after all and there was nothing. He didn’t expect to be _ aware _ of it though. 

There was nothing, and then there was…

_ Everything. _

He didn’t know how long it took for him to finally find some semblance of consciousness or to re-arrange his mind into cohesive thoughts, but when he did, he felt a warmth wash over him. It was the Sun. It shone brightly above him, it felt… _ Different _ than what he remembered. It was the sun’s warmth, he knew it, yet it didn’t feel the same and neither did _ he_. 

He felt _ more _ than what he used to feel, but he didn’t know _ what _ it was so he tried to focus on to a familiar sensation. There was something flowing. Something cool, _ water _ . A stream. He reached out to touch it but he couldn’t at least not in the way he hoped to, his arms weren’t there — he tried not to despair about his arms not being there… _ For the most part _ — He kept trying again and again until he realized the stream was touching _ him_. 

_ No. _

The stream was _ part _ of him. It seemed weird and wrong and downright impossible, but it was _ right _ . He couldn’t explain it… He just _ knew _. He focused on that new feeling and basked in it. And then he felt more of that, in different places all over him and everywhere. The best way to put it was like if the streams were the blood that used to flow through his veins. That however was still inaccurate, he had never felt the blood that coursed through his veins. This didn’t feel like that. 

After a while he became more acquainted with the feeling and started to notice other things, something moving in the water displacing it in little ripples below the surface, _ fish _, he concluded. There were other subtle little things that he thought were plants below the surface. 

It takes him longer to understand the other things that he felt, but in time he could tell that things were growing out of him — yet another crazy thought that was immensely correct — _ trees _. Of all shapes and sizes and the branches that grew out of them and their leaves. He could feel the wind passing through and caressing them as gently as a lover’s hand, the bounce of the different fruits, their weight when they fell on the ground.

It was beautiful, and he wanted them to grow. They fed off of each other. He gave to them and they willingly took and gave it back to him. 

More and more he becomes familiar with each new feeling. More and more Noctis the _ man _ fades but he isn’t truly _ gone _ , he is part of something bigger he _ is _ something bigger. 

The last thing that he became aware of was the people. 

They walked and ran and danced on him. They built, they laughed and they cried. _ They lived. _

He couldn’t physically smile like he did before, yet he _ was _ smiling. 

There was a relief in knowing that his sacrifice was worth it. It washed over him in powerful waves and he couldn’t help but search amongst the people for 3 specific faces he did know. 

In the shores of Galdin sitting on the sand were his three friends. Their hair was grey and the scars on their faces were lost in the midst of wrinkles and lines that told him just how long it had been since he last saw them. It did not seem that long to Noctis and a feeling crept it’s way on to him and twisted his core, he had spent longer _ away _ from them then he had ever spent _ with _ them. He wished to be there by their side forever and he wished they knew that. 

Perhaps they do. 

He focuses on them and holds on, they seem peaceful in a way Noctis doesn’t remember ever having seen before. He observes while they reminisce over daily stories and watches has people walk over to them adults and kids, their families he realizes. Partners, children, grandchildren. Noctis sees a sweet smile growing on Ignis’ lips when a little girl, no more than three years old wraps her small arms around his neck and kisses his cheek. Gladio ruffles the hair on top of a young boy’s head and a woman kneels beside Prompto, a soft hand on his shoulders and she says something that makes him laugh. The most genuine laugh he heard from Prompto in years.

She looks like him Noctis notes. 

The sun is setting and the skies slowly turn gray and rain starts pouring when Noctis can’t help but cry. He observes has they all stand up and laugh their way to the closest shelter. 

He cries, but he is happy. They’ve walked tall. And he couldn’t be more proud of them. So he makes a promise to watch over everyone. And hopes that this time humanity can stand together and walk tall. 

That this time… They will do better by the world.

**Author's Note:**

> Title Breakdown:
> 
> Aerde: Danish for "Earth" 
> 
> Welt: German for "World" and English for "Strike/Rising Scar" 
> 
> Maybe I made a poor use of all these languages together but you get the idea XD


End file.
